Becoming Restored, Changes, Signs

Terminal D

As I sat in terminal D four days ago at the Philadelphia airport I couldn’t help but think of the last time I was here. Our entire family was heading to Maui for TJ’s Make a Wish trip.  It was a happy time. Happy knowing TJ would get to see the banyan tree. That tree was the reason he chose…

Read More

Uncategorized

I Will Never….

Two days ago as I headed off to work I saw all the high school kids walking to the bus. There was a boy from our court and all I could think was ‘TJ should be getting on that bus.’ In that instant all the little moments I won’t get to see and experience because of TJ’s death came flooding…

Read More

Uncategorized

Memory Lane

I’m feeling nostalgic, not just for my angel boy, but for all the fun times we had as a young family. Here are some of my favorites   Top L to R: TJ, cousin Zach, Luli (grandmother), cousin Natalie; TJ with Aunt Jami; Cousin Ashley and TJ; Bottom L to R: TJ with Aunt Katie; Cousin Pete hugging TJ  …

Read More

Uncategorized

I Got Here First

Today has been quite an interesting day filled with little signs from my TJ. But I to tell you the story of today I must tell you the story of yesterday. And the day before. Two days ago I mentally marked off the 27th month without TJ. It was a day like any other day except with the glaring reality…

Read More

Dreams

Deep Waters

Some angel-mamas I know seem to have regular dream visits from their angels. I have only had four and one daytime visit. I know there are those who don’t believe in visits from their loved ones and that’s okay. That’s not really the point of this post. I only mention it to say that I am not someone who gets…

Read More

Uncategorized

He is NOT His Things

In a previous post I mentioned that I started an online course designed to help the reader identify emotional obstacles to clearing away clutter & having a more spacious home and life. Since that time a dear sweet angel-mama-sister said that our kids (our dead kids, though it applies universally to all of us) are not their things. The message…

Read More

Uncategorized

You Are All Around Me

This past weekend I went to the movies with my husband. I had picked out a suspense/thriller thinking he would like and I would probably like it (a hopeful win-win). Ultimately we saw something else entirely. Something I’m not really sure how we settled on. He was very willing to see anything I chose but every movie we chose had…

Read More

Uncategorized

Packing it all Away

admin / February 21, 2018

It may come as a surprise to you (truth be told I’m sure it will be a surprise to most if not all of you) to learn that pretty much all of our Christmas decorations are still up. Not that I’ve ever been one to put things away right after New Year’s, but I at least had things down by…

Read More

Uncategorized

Point A to Point B

admin / February 8, 2018

Sometimes getting through this grief thing isn’t anything dramatic. Sometimes it’s simply getting from point A to point B in your day, and then the next day & the next. Before you know it there’s a string of points & you’ve made it through several days or even a week. I guess that’s been my week. I hadn’t even realized…

Read More

For the newly grieved

And It’s OK

admin / January 26, 2018

I’ve been wanting to write this post for several days. Last week I went to a funeral for a friend’s son. He took his very young life. As I hugged her she sadly whispered in my ear, “I guess I’m in the club now,” and so I must “welcome” this woman with a heavy heart into a club that no…

Read More