Two days ago as I headed off to work I saw all the high school kids walking to the bus. There was a boy from our court and all I could think was ‘TJ should be getting on that bus.’ In that instant all the little moments I won’t get to see and experience because of TJ’s death came flooding…
I’m feeling nostalgic, not just for my angel boy, but for all the fun times we had as a young family. Here are some of my favorites  Top L to R: TJ, cousin Zach, Luli (grandmother), cousin Natalie; TJ with Aunt Jami; Cousin Ashley and TJ; Bottom L to R: TJ with Aunt Katie; Cousin Pete hugging TJ …
Today has been quite an interesting day filled with little signs from my TJ. But I to tell you the story of today I must tell you the story of yesterday. And the day before. Two days ago I mentally marked off the 27th month without TJ. It was a day like any other day except with the glaring reality…
Some angel-mamas I know seem to have regular dream visits from their angels. I have only had four and one daytime visit. I know there are those who don’t believe in visits from their loved ones and that’s okay. That’s not really the point of this post. I only mention it to say that I am not someone who gets…
In a previous post I mentioned that I started an online course designed to help the reader identify emotional obstacles to clearing away clutter & having a more spacious home and life. Since that time a dear sweet angel-mama-sister said that our kids (our dead kids, though it applies universally to all of us) are not their things. The message…
This past weekend I went to the movies with my husband. I had picked out a suspense/thriller thinking he would like and I would probably like it (a hopeful win-win). Ultimately we saw something else entirely. Something I’m not really sure how we settled on. He was very willing to see anything I chose but every movie we chose had…
It may come as a surprise to you (truth be told I’m sure it will be a surprise to most if not all of you) to learn that pretty much all of our Christmas decorations are still up. Not that I’ve ever been one to put things away right after New Year’s, but I at least had things down by…
Sometimes getting through this grief thing isn’t anything dramatic. Sometimes it’s simply getting from point A to point B in your day, and then the next day & the next. Before you know it there’s a string of points & you’ve made it through several days or even a week. I guess that’s been my week. I hadn’t even realized…
I’ve been wanting to write this post for several days. Last week I went to a funeral for a friend’s son. He took his very young life. As I hugged her she sadly whispered in my ear, “I guess I’m in the club now,” and so I must “welcome” this woman with a heavy heart into a club that no…
This evening while standing over a sink of dishes and feeling like the rug had been yanked out from under me, my husband asked if I still feel the same level of intense heartache that I felt two years ago. Today marks two years since TJ’s Celebration of Life and somehow it feels like it was but a moment ago…